Friends, Family & Carers Forum

[Sienna20]

Hi Everyone 

I’ve just joined tonight in the hopes of connecting with others in similar situations. My daughter has schizophrenia & can become very angry and aggressive towards me. 
She is often accusing me of certain things & abusing me

verbally & makes threats to physically hit me. 
Im just at my wits end & warn out 

[Former-Member]

Hi @Sienna20 

I just logged in and want to say hello.

Welcome to the forum.

Someone will reply but sometimes it takes a bit.

I have heard of, but not lived your experience.

The people persisted with doctors changing medication. 

Daughter put locks on bedroom door.

Made disturbing allegations.

In the end was admitted to the hospital.

There is no magic pill.

The top of the recipe in Helping others is "Frustration"

We know we are not appreciated.

Vent here.

I do feel for you. Especially because it is your daughter. That is so hard.

You probably realise, yiur daughter is probably not really aware of what she is doing. Correct Medication shpuld help.

As hard as it is,  Don't take it personally.

[Jane241]

I spoke to the CATT team about being on the receiving end of my daughter's aggression and was told that mothers are usually the brunt. But it's tough and if you feel it is becoming very difficult then it might help to talk it through with someone else. 

My other daughter pointed out to me that my attempts to get her sister to do the right thing in order to help her get better are likely counterproductive and she encouraged me to step back a bit. 

Speaking to the other daughter about the situation helped me get a different perspective. It's all so hard to talk about that I usually don't.  But now I think I should do it more.

I sympathise.  It's difficult enough and getting abused is painful and stressful.

[tyme]

Hey @Jane241,

I hear you.

Instead of being on the receiving end, I was the one being aggressive. So I speak from that perspective.

Yes, in my acute state, I hurt those closest to me. I didn't have schizophrenia, but in my distress I lashed out. My aggression was due to me feeling I was out of control. I tried to re-gain control through aggression (I'm not saying this was the right thing to do).

I respect those who set boundaries. They called emergency services when it was needed. I hated them for it at that time, but I am grateful for it. 

Also, in the end, i just wanted space to recover. Maybe your daughter is right in saying she needs space.

I'd encourage you to set clear boundaries in order to protect yourself.

Please take care. 

Oh, just that so you know, I am very stable now. So much better through therapy and support. 

It IS possible.